No Longer Mine

I wrote this when I was 14 and dug it up again today. I thought you might enjoy the musings of my younger self.

No longer mine

10.08

What does it mean to say I love you?

Explosive. Swelled heart and love begins to open up the seams that held it closed; that held the sleeping treasure… now conscious and alive. Uncontainable yet caught within the small confines of my heart. It is irrepressible, begging to be let out, but still in my feeble hands.

Humbled. I am not enough. I lost a piece of me that only you can find. These words are more powerful than me … ‘I love you’. Supremacy surrendered, I am yours.

Reserved. You own a piece inside my heart. Prime real estate surrounded by caution tape. The deal signed. Preserved for one. Unmarred by footsteps in the ground. Your sign is carved in stone. Can’t be unwritten. The mark is there forever for better or worse.

Suicide. My identity no longer who I am, but tangled up with you; a whole new creature. Do two deaths make life… abundantly? Yet from winter’s decay, spring flowers bloom and grow.

Promise. A debt of adoration, a commitment made to keep day in, day out. Sunrise to Sunset. Rainbow or Raincloud. Will thirsty come and find the well cracked and dry? But storms will pass and leave world crisp and new. Let not the promise fail, instead be cleansed.

Infinity. No termination in this life. And when death anew is at our doors, the end is the beginning. The death is life again.